We released some new bike shirts today, including "Iowa: Get Your Crotch Ready," a tank-top we will probably sell about 3 of. But, like with a lot of our projects, there was a lot left on the cutting room floor. Here is a sample of ideas we didn't use:
get on my pegs, bro, we’re ridin’ across this state
are there showers at the camp ground?
sorry for the smell, i was under the impression there’d be showers at the camp grounds
free love (bicycle and unicylce)
i don’t always ride my bike, but when i do it’s across the entire state of iowa
i don’t always ride my bike, but when i do it’s while eating pie
i don’t always ride my bike drunk, but i am right now
tight shorts, tight bulges
bring that bulge to my tent
you mind if a man in really tight shorts and funny shoes stands next you? and i also smell like a butt.
different strokes for different spokes
i bet she gives good helmet
bicycling: i’m so healthy!
a guy in Denmark can ride about 12 miles per hour
i heard a guy rode across the whole state in 1 day
Big Bicycle Ride Across The State of Iowa (BBRATSOI)
big bulges for a big bike ride
big bike ride, sweaty bulges
310 miles: get your crotch ready
iowa: some chaffing may occur
iowa: get in some spandex and climb on
iowa: mount up
lovehandles and handlebars
i will pump you up (with a bike pump)
wheels pumped, ass plump
RAGBRAI: the longest bike ride in existence …. or at least in iowa
i love ridin’ bikes, eating pie, and drinking beer.
how many more miles till pie?
i’m really bustin’ my ass for free pie
i thought this was the great pie ride
riding for pie
will ride for pie
i’m just here for the pie
when’s the next pie stop? the suspension is killing me.
... and then we remembered that a couple years ago, when RAGBRAI was coming through Des Moines, we were hired to do a shirt. After designing it, we were told we couldn't use the word RAGBRAI. Anyway, the camping was in Water Works park and the logo was a pig riding a bicycle. Lance Armstrong was on it that year, so that explains quite a few of the ideas.
RAGBRAI des moines: the greatest bike party in the universe
RAGBRAI des moines: greatest bike ride, greatest city
RAGBRAI des moines: and i thought i had a good time in perry!
RAGBRAI des moines: party like you’ve been lying about using hyperbolic steroids for years
RAGBRAI des moines: dope
RAGBRAI des moines: a party on hyperbolic steroids
RAGBRAI des moines: hyper-bicycle-party
RAGBRAI des moines: catch hyperbolic steroids
RAGBRAI des moines: grand champion of RAGBRAI stops, until we have our title taken away for doping
RAGBRAI des moines: french for ride the moines
RAGBRAI des moines: french for RAGBRAI the moines
RAGBRAI des moines: tour de water works kybos
RAGBRAI des moines: tour de beer tents
RAGBRAI des moines: tour de hangover
RAGBRAI des moines: party like its 1973
RAGBRAI: des moines unchained
RAGBRAI des moines: it's all downhill from here
RAGBRAI des moines: fuuuuuuck
RAGBRAI des moines: come for the 80s cover band, stay for our insurance industry
RAGBRAI des moines: dip your tire in our river and call it a ride
RAGBRAI des moines: two rivers to dip your tires in
RAGBRAI des moines: two rivers, two tires
RAGBRAI des moines: two rivers, one bike
on a steel horse i RAGBRAI: des moines
des moines RAGBRAI: i get 1,000 miles to the gallon on this hog
RAGBRAI des moines: it's like a pig riding a bicycle … trust us
RAGBRAI des moines: you've seen a pig ride a bicycle, now watch that same pig party to an 80s cover band and throw up behind a kybo after getting his "wanna come to my tent?" line rejected by a middle-aged lady-pig.