Fall is in the air, which means FOOTBALL IS BACK! So if you're an athletic supporter, grab that racket, lace up them new kicks, put on your best mustache and head to the rink for America's pastime! Cheer on your favorite team by saying, "Go and do good against the other team, guys! Play better and score more points or less points if this is golf!"

High five some people nearby. Boo the referees! Say things like, "That call was total bullshit! That ball was not on the line, or he was not over the line, or he was over the line, depending on if we're talking about off sides, out of bounds, or scoring!"

Then shake your head. Then cheer again. Then tell everyone around you that, "People will remember this game forever just like I remember who won so much last year, or did they win last year, or was that the year before?" Sports!